1. Look back from where you came.
Even if you are dripping salty sweat, you won’t turn into a pillar of salt by looking backward on the trail. In fact, you may see castles and sunrises that you would have otherwise ignored.
2. There’s always another hill.
Now we are expecting them daily. The steepest inclines have largely been conquered, so some of us are pleased to say, “Bring it on.” But when it’s hot and the scenery is in short supply, a hill is a slap in the face.
3. When there’s no scenery to enjoy, you have to think or look down.
If you look down, you may see a beetle or a slug. If there’s nothing interesting beneath your feet, you ponder the mysteries of existence, creation, and why knights thought their armor was better than guerrilla warfare or better than treating your neighbor like yourself.
4. Converting kilometers to miles.
Nancy taught me a nice formula to convert kilometers to miles by multiplying times six and moving the decimal point. But now I have learned my mastery of multiplication tables is a bit rusty. Eight times six is not 56.
5. Everyday, we can depend upon the fact that our back packs get lighter.
I have left a Seahawks hat behind. I threw away a cheap rain poncho. My vitamins are being consumed, and Nancy has left a trail of her panties in hotel rooms all across Northern Spain.
6. No one’s ever heard of Diet Coke.
Don’t use the word “Coke” on the Camino. It’s the full on “CocaCola” for starters. Thank heaven there been not a single sighting of Pepsi. But if you want to avoid all that sugar, then every single store or restaurant is pleased to you a CocaCola Zero. And if you ask for. “Diet Coke,” all you get is a head sawing “no.” I am now a Zero convert.
7. Every town has a tall church, and most towns are on a hill.
It makes sense since towns and villages were always on the defense from invaders, and the church ran everything for centuries. More importantly for today, the towers ring bells every 15 minutes, telling us civilization is near. A CocoCola Zero on ice is nearby.
8. John Deer is the tractor of choice.
Plenty of the green and yellow tractors work the fields as we pass by. I have not seen another brand. None of those all-yellow or red brands show up. Therefore, I am taking my observation as an astute stock market tip, given there is so much agriculture taking place in Northern Spain: Wheat, flax, oats, alfalfa, alongside sunflowers, onions, turnips, hogs, sheep, and cattle. Buy stock, paper stock that is, not cows.
9. The restaurant kitchens do not open until 7:30 p.m.
Entrepreneurial advice: First go for the siesta about 2 o’clock. Reopen the business about 5:30. If you have a bar and grill, serve only prepared tapas and drinks between 5:30 and 7:30. Expect a large crowd of people after 8 o’clock for dinner, even though elderly pilgrims are already asleep.
10. I am spoiled about my Internet.
I am used to blazing NASCAR-style Internet speeds at work. Freeway speeds at home. City traffic speeds at Starbucks — that’s why I am spoiled. I did not expect to being going back to 300-baud modem speeds a la 1985 to use the Internet while traveling in Spain. Granted, our stays are in very rural towns, some with less than 300 people. So I can’t say that Comcast has any fiber going through these hilltop addresses. For several days now, attempts to upload photos have been met with time-out messages, and I fall asleep waiting for an image to find it proper place on a website or archive.
